I was blessed that networking came naturally to me. Early in my career, I was surrounded by strong networkers whose confidence and openness shaped my own ability to build relationships. Their presence gave me courage, and opportunities seemed to follow.
Over time, though, I’ve learned that networking can’t be taken for granted. It isn’t something you either have or don’t — it’s a skill you can develop. A network isn’t just a list of names or old colleagues. It’s alive, and like anything alive, it thrives only with care and steady investment of time and effort.
And its value goes far beyond jobs. Networks come in handy when you’re stuck — not just in your career, but in life. When you need a trusted recommendation. When you’re looking for validation on a tough decision. Even when you’re trying to jump the queue to see a consultant or find access to VIP seats at an event. A strong network doesn’t just open doors professionally; it smooths paths personally.
Most of the jobs I’ve landed over my 30-year career didn’t come from applying into adverts. They came through my network — people who knew me and wanted to help. People I had spent time with: wall climbing after work, golfing on weekends, or sitting late in the office when deadlines loomed. These opportunities came because someone thought of me as a safe bet: someone they could recommend with confidence, someone they trusted to add value. That trust was built through shared time, experiences, presence, and rapport.
I now see networking as both an eco-system and a personal attribute such as fitness, knowledge, personality. An ecosystem thrives on interdependence: water flows, bees pollinate, roots exchange nutrients. A network works the same way — trust and opportunity circulate when you keep it alive. Fitness reminds me that strength doesn’t appear overnight. It’s built through small, consistent reps over time.
Here are five lessons that have helped me keep my network alive and thriving.
1. Show up consistently
If you only water a garden once a season, it will wither. If you only go to the gym occasionally, you won’t get stronger. Networks need the same steady presence.
Lesson: Setting aside regular time — a coffee meeting, a quick WhatsApp check-in, or an occasional lunch — keeps relationships alive. I’ve also learned to say yes more often than no when people reach out. Unless it clashes with something truly important, that extra hour spent connecting is one of the best investments you can make.
2. Give before you ask
Healthy ecosystems are built on exchange. Soil feeds the plants, bees pollinate flowers, rivers nourish the land. Relationships thrive on the same principle: generosity first.
Lesson: Connecting two people who might benefit from knowing each other is one of the simplest ways to give. It doesn’t need an immediate return. Small gestures like inviting people into your home, showing interest in their lives and families, or creating good memories deepen relationships. And some people are natural “super-connectors.” Responding to them strengthens both their network and yours.
3. Nurture relationships over time
Trust, like muscle, doesn’t form in a single session. And like a lawn, if you don’t seed and water it regularly, it soon turns patchy. Networks fade the same way when left unattended.
Lesson: Likes on social media don’t count as nurturing. What matters are genuine touches: a thoughtful comment, a message of congratulations, or a quick one-to-one check-in. These small, steady acts keep the roots strong and the weeds out.
4. Diversify your connections
A monoculture garden is fragile. A single exercise builds one muscle group but leaves the rest weak. Diversity creates resilience — in nature and in networks.
Lesson: The richest opportunities often come from outside the immediate circle or industry. That’s why I’ve learned to go beyond silos. I’ve also discovered the value of leaning into my own culture. Authenticity accelerates trust. Being rooted in who you are creates deeper ties than chasing “wannabe” circles ever will.
5. Be authentic and reliable
An ecosystem collapses without balance. Fitness collapses without steady effort. In networking, reliability is the foundation.
Lesson: I’ve made it a point to follow through, even on small promises. Sending the article I mentioned or making the introduction I offered — these little acts add up. Over time, they build credibility. And credibility is what carries your reputation through the network, often into rooms you’ve never entered.
A final reflection
Perhaps the most important lesson I’ve learned is not to be protective of the network. Don’t hoard it. Share it. The more connected an ecosystem is, the stronger it becomes. By helping others expand their circles, you don’t dilute your influence — you multiply it.
Networking has brought me opportunities, but more importantly, it has given me friendships, perspective, and confidence. I was fortunate to be shaped early on by strong networkers, but I’ve learned a network is never finished. It requires consistency, investment, and care. Treat it like the ecosystem it is, and it will continue to grow — not just for you, but for everyone in it.
Start now. The best time to build a network is long before you need one. It costs nothing but time, and yet it can open doors, shape careers, and enrich life in ways no balance sheet ever could.
